So as some of you may have heard, I just signed a 13-year $325 million contract to… ok that’s a lie. I can’t even think of something to finish that sentence with. How crappy is that? People are getting paid $325 gazillion to do actual things and I can’t even come up with the ending to a sentence. Mo’ money mo’ problems though, am I right?
I have, however, committed to contributing to WordPress’s Weekly Photo Challenge! For free! Please, please, calm down. I know you’re excited but get your shit together, people.
This week’s challenge is ACHIEVEMENT. I mean, really… where do I even begin? There’s so much. With the Emmy I won earlier this year, my Nobel Prize in chemistry, and being crowned Miss USA for the 3rd year in a row… I don’t even know what I would choose for this. OK maybe I’m lying again. It was only my 2nd year. Regardless of this, I have chosen a photo that represents the time I DID NOT DIE ON A MOUNTAIN IN SWITZERLAND.
There was a time when I thought that would be the only possibility and that time was a short two years ago. There was a lot of crying, heavy breathing, and panicked mumbling of sorts and I hadn’t even made it to the top. This year, not only did I make it to the summit of that big beautiful mountain, but I did something even more bonkers the next day. This year I completed a VIA FERRATA complete with exposed cliff walks, tightrope traverses over waterfalls and gorges, the scariest bridge ever crossed 1,500 feet above the valley, and friends that swore their lives to murder me for what I made them do. The fact that I’m still here on Earth to think up new ways to scare the bejesus out of my friends is quite an ACHIEVEMENT.